Tonight we saw 2 couples call it quits - Jess and Dave, along with Craig and Andy. And we saw one couple declare their love - Bella and Michael.
So I wanted to think about the contrast between Craig and Andy (who split) and Bella and Michael (declaring love). Craig is demonstrative and an all-in type of guy. He wanted affection, touches, kisses, and displays of love. Andy's slow and reserved, so this pairing didn't get off the ground because of the difference in expectations, largely. (I'm sure there was more - possibly lack of mutual attraction as with Jess & Dave).
Bella and Michael are both like Craig. They're both touchy, demonstrative people who have gone all-in very quickly. Their relationship has worked, to date, because they're both moving at a suitable speed, with signs they both understand. They've found a lot in common, and seem to be quite open in their affections (Bella even saying they'd christened rooms).
But how does this sort of a relationship work when they get to a point where signs aren't clear to one; or the speed changes? Tonight Michael had old photos out and Bella got prickly when there were photos of old girlfriends. She walked away. And the discussion of Michael's child was quite brief (which may be editing) and this hasn't been brought up again (may be editing), not even when looking at photos. These couple of things make me look at how relationships get deeper, and it seems to all rely on communication - and if you aren't communicating in the same way, or a way that each understands, then the relationship seems doomed.
Jess and Dave were doomed. Right at the start, he wasn't physically attracted to her and although he said he wasn't sure that was important and he thought things might develop, he was kidding himself. When there was no instant chemistry, he turned off. He wasn't interested in anything that wasn't insta-love. Which is interesting for a writer...because that 'chemistry' at meeting seems to be almost a necessity for putting an effort to get to know the person deeper.
Bella and Michael had an instant chemistry that they've taken to love with their fast paced relationship.
Craig was instantly attracted to Andy and then was bitter when his affection wasn't returned.
Keller was instantly attracted to Nicole, and she was won over very quickly by his caring vows.
Monica and Mark both saw each other as hot.
A lot to be said for instant attraction or chemistry or just being 'into' someone.
So I wanted to think about the contrast between Craig and Andy (who split) and Bella and Michael (declaring love). Craig is demonstrative and an all-in type of guy. He wanted affection, touches, kisses, and displays of love. Andy's slow and reserved, so this pairing didn't get off the ground because of the difference in expectations, largely. (I'm sure there was more - possibly lack of mutual attraction as with Jess & Dave).
Bella and Michael are both like Craig. They're both touchy, demonstrative people who have gone all-in very quickly. Their relationship has worked, to date, because they're both moving at a suitable speed, with signs they both understand. They've found a lot in common, and seem to be quite open in their affections (Bella even saying they'd christened rooms).
But how does this sort of a relationship work when they get to a point where signs aren't clear to one; or the speed changes? Tonight Michael had old photos out and Bella got prickly when there were photos of old girlfriends. She walked away. And the discussion of Michael's child was quite brief (which may be editing) and this hasn't been brought up again (may be editing), not even when looking at photos. These couple of things make me look at how relationships get deeper, and it seems to all rely on communication - and if you aren't communicating in the same way, or a way that each understands, then the relationship seems doomed.
Jess and Dave were doomed. Right at the start, he wasn't physically attracted to her and although he said he wasn't sure that was important and he thought things might develop, he was kidding himself. When there was no instant chemistry, he turned off. He wasn't interested in anything that wasn't insta-love. Which is interesting for a writer...because that 'chemistry' at meeting seems to be almost a necessity for putting an effort to get to know the person deeper.
Bella and Michael had an instant chemistry that they've taken to love with their fast paced relationship.
Craig was instantly attracted to Andy and then was bitter when his affection wasn't returned.
Keller was instantly attracted to Nicole, and she was won over very quickly by his caring vows.
Monica and Mark both saw each other as hot.
A lot to be said for instant attraction or chemistry or just being 'into' someone.
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