Friday, May 2, 2014

Phallic Friday - safe sex

OMG! I caught myself out with the safe sex stuff!

You know, the age old debate (well, not so age old, maybe only in recent years) - condom on, or off, or do we need it mentioned in fiction?

Well, I've been trying to be a good author and do the "on" thing after a discussion among the erotic authors.

I know Lily is in the "we don't need it mentioned in fiction" camp.

Well, I wrote myself into a hole (ah, yes, not that kind - the word kind!). Oral sex is low risk for HIV transfer. I knew that, so I had my character having condom-free oral sex. Then something nagged at the back of my mind and I thought I should check that it is was right. My character was so adamant that she was being safe.

Oh oh.

While you're generally safe against HIV transfer, not so with STDs. I was in a pickle - not so much as my character who'd been swallowing enough potentially germy seed to start some major illnesses.

So what do you do? How do you handle a character who needs to have condom-free head (this is part of the motivation for the character's sex life) but also needs to be safe? Should you worry?

So, that's been my week's dilemma. Thank goodness it's a writing one and not a real life issue where I'm waiting for my tests to come back!

How's your week been!?


  1. Okay, I'm here, I'll bite.
    What "potentially germy seed" can start major illnesses? I've never heard this before? This is a whole new side to the condom debate. I can't think of anything that would kill the mood more than settling in for head, and starting a condom discussion and I can't remember any romance book I've read where the condom was an issue for mouth jobs?? Maybe the condom's gotta be chocolate flavoured... but I'm sorry... no. It's just not cricket.


    1. Apparently syphilis, chlamydia and gonnorrhea are all trasferred via oral as well as penetrative sex. I guess for female on male, it's not so much the sperm (seed) as the contact with the skin.

      It's times like this that I'm glad I'm old and married and don't have to worry.

      And I'm sure in Deep Diving they have oral sex it was only this stupid story I realised. Lord, such tricks for new players. I might have to switch to the free sex in fiction debate!

      Thanks for biting!

      Cate xo

    2. That's it. I think I'm closing the goddamn bedroom door for ever more and bugger everyone.