Sunday, February 15, 2015

Sunday Story - the life of an erotic writer

I need to have a little rant today...about the slurs erotic writers cop all the frigging time. Not just from non-writers, but from writers too - and within the romance community. You'd think we were writing about horrible, awful things instead of something that is normal and natural. It's almost as if they think sex is shockingly disgusting (and therefore we are too) yet I can prove most of the whingers and complainers have actually had sex (they have natural-born children - can't have more proof than that).

People who write erotic romance, can actually write. It's not that all our stories contain is sex. We tell a story, we add sex into that story. We have all the skills of a 'normal' romance writer, with the added skill of writing a fully depicted sex scene.

People who write erotic romance are entitled to be published and publicised, have readers, have series, have support from publishing houses. We aren't a lesser entity because of what we write. We're writers. We write stories.

And contrary to popular opinion, we can write stories where the sex is minimal, or even non-existent. There are quite a few erotic authors with 'sweet' stories too, and some who write in two or more sub-genres (one being not erotic). So we don't need to have sex in our stories, we choose to. If you'd like us to write something that's 'sweet' then all you need to do is ask politely - no need for nastiness or assumptions that we're incapable.

People who write erotic romance are illuminating a shadowy side of life - sex lives. Society tries to hide from sex, or snigger about it, or be shocked by it - but erotic writers are taking a stand and saying that we're proud to discuss sex. It's a natural facet of life that doesn't need the shadows and innuendo and crap.

So next time you're going to sneer at someone, think about what you're actually saying and showing. Sometimes you're a hypocrite - especially when your child is proof that you've had sex at least once!

If you prefer me not to speak about sex, I'm more than happy to discuss other topics. I've been doing so for many years and am quite capable of holding a conversation without 'corrupting' you, or even mentioning sex.

I'm an erotic writer. I write about sex. I have an imagination. I tell stories. And I'm bloody proud of what I do.


  1. It does annoy me (I'll rant with you) to see competitions or anthologies or promotions or (whatever) where they say: excluding erotica... ie they only want contemporary stories, but no erotica. A lot of the contemporary stuff I read is pretty darn close to erotica actually, sometimes I'm blown if I can tell the difference. That's from within the writing community I guess. Your comment sounds more like talking to people that they're dissing what you do/write as not being worthy. Who cares? Write what you want to write. YOU!!! Yes you Missy!! Are about to be a print author with the Secret Confessions anthology I see - so YOU are the winner. Bugger everyone else! :)

    1. Yeah, the non-personal stuff is annoying, you're right. And there is often little difference now between steamy romances and erotica. I always thought erotica was that if you took away the sex, the relationship didn't exist...but now it seems you need something 'extra to normal sex' to be erotica. I don't know! The definitions change quicker than I can!

      Yeah, my ranting was a bit more of a personal thing that irked me too much to shut up.

      But you're right, who cares? I enjoy writing about sex and exploring different facets in a relationships.

      And yes, print. I'm going to blog it on Sunday. That was an awesome surprise :)

      Thanks, Lily.

      Cate xo