Phallic Friday - anal sex

Confession time again - anal sex is one of my favourites because it's rough, gritty, taboo and dashed with a slice of pain. I love writing anal sex scenes because I can teeter on that pleasure pain threshold tipping it either way.

But I've never published an anal sex scene. Why not? Because mine aren't like the others, and I haven't got the courage to show mine to the light of day yet.


So, I had this conversation with another erotic author who does a lot of anal sex scenes - and you know, erotic authors have these kinds of conversations.

Kaliana Cole writes stories often with multiple males for a female, and they're ripping stories. I love them. And her anal sex scenes are gritty... but she has these huge lead ups where the woman is "educated" and "prepared" for anal sex. (In mine it just happens). So, Kaliana Cole and I have this conversation that goes something like this -

Me: I think you do amazing anal scenes but why all the build up to it? Why not just do it?

KC (with a shocked kind of expression): Because you have to get people ready for it.

Me: you do? What's wrong with a bit of lube and touching?

KC: No, not the character, the reader. (she must see that I still have no idea) If you look at statistics, most women who have had anal sex have had a bad experience.

Me: Stats?

KC: You know, polls in women's magazines, stuff on the internet, stories you hear. So, you have to get the reader past their bad experience and into a mindset where they can enjoy the anal sex.


Okay... so maybe the conversation was a bit more in depth than this and filled with more stats and more evidence and more detail... but you get the drift.

I write what I want to write - and I hadn't even considered the readers.

Kaliana Cole has done her work and considers her readers, targetting to stories and her scenes to meet what a reader wants.

This was a revelation to me (and seriously, it shouldn't have been, but you do know I'm slow on the uptake, don;t you?) because I was writing for me... not for anyone else.

So, tomorrow I have a book going live. A book I wrote for me, without any consideration for readers. Thankfully there's no rough, gritty, painful anal sex in it... but you know... I'm a bit scared. Is what I like so different to other people's tastes? My contest feedback seems to suggest that at least 33% of the population will hate what I write (I always get at least one judge who hates my story enough to give 50-60% marks). So that means one third of all reviews will be awful. Which means I won't look.

Which takes me back to anal sex - why do I like it gritty, rough, with a dash of pain? It's kind of a bit like my writing life - I must be a masochist!

So... do you have any views on anal sex, or writing and the joy of pain! :)